Do Adults Who Are ‘Only Trying to Help’ Sometimes Make Things Worse?

I would think, that if you are a person who thinks that people who are trying to help are making things worse, you probably shouldn’t be open to help. Just keep your troubles to yourself.

Then again, there are those people who can’t help themselves and try to help you. It’s in their nature to help you through things because they were taught to do so, or they want to fulfill their one good deed for the day. Those ones you’ll just have to politely turn them away, or just just straight up tell them they’re not helping. No point in keeping it to yourself because they know something is wrong and won’t stop until it’s resolved. It’s almost annoying.

Now it doesn’t have to be something troubling you that people are trying to help you with. It could be as simple as helping you mow the lawn or do the dishes. Either way, it depends on the attitude of the one being helped. They might prefer to do things themselves because they find it’s the most efficient way. Any other factors may deter them. If so, politely reject the help.

Let’s return to the actual part where someone is troubled. It could be due to the loss of someone important or something along the lines of that same emotional shock. I think here the lines are blurred as to when help is important. We know the general emotional state they’re in, but to what extent have they recovered from it? It’s hard to read when it’s too early to help or when it’s too late to help. So when people try to help, the results may not be so satisfactory. You may actually be making their situation worse.

My simple answer to all of this is; If you don’t want help, keep the troubles to yourself. I think social media is a gift and a curse for things like this. It’s a great way to get emotional support from the people you know who care. Though for me, who has this negative side to it, almost sounds as if it’s some cry for attention. You just want people to empathize with you the same way they did for others. Again, this is just me being terrible and negative about that. I can’t imagine that being 100% true.

If it was me, I wouldn’t share any troubles on social media. I would feel more like a person looking for pity points than someone looking for support. I couldn’t do it. People don’t need to know that much about my life anyway. It’d also be one of those things where people who have never cared about things you share on social media only decide to care about you once something tragic has happened in your life. Again, being negative.

If you don’t want help, if you don’t want people make things worse for you, put on a mask and pretend nothing is wrong. We all have different ways to dealing with things. I like the lone wolf approach. It speaks to me.