Friday, April 20, 2012

Where Did the Confidence Go?


Where does it all go? When we pursue the things we want, suddenly we’re hit by a rush of self-doubt. Why? Why are we, as humans, so nervous when it comes to completing tasks or chasing dreams? I’ve really tried to ponder this for a while, and want to get my thoughts out on this particular topic.

Society is the biggest judge of peoples’ choices. They set the rules which dictate what normal behavior is and what is not. So when someone decides they’re going to do something, they have to take a step back and think, “What will people say about this? Will it affect me and other around me”? They build up the confidence to do something, and then at that split second, they decide to add society into their plan and figure out what the potential outcome of their actions are. The easiest example to use is when a guy wants to ask a girl out, not always for a date, but to hang out and get to know them. You plan it all out, how you want to ask her, and then you decide to think about what her friends would think of her asking you, or you over analyze this girl by her tone of voice towards you and her body expressions to see if she’s even remotely interested in you. They are a huge deterrence to your confidence level. You wonder if this is going to be awkward or how she’s probably out of your league because society puts you in two different levels. Oh society, how I hate you so.

Perhaps probably a subtopic to society, but peer pressure really destroys your confidence. People try to get you to do something or they expect something big from your and you feel obligated to meet expectations. But that’s a big burden on some people. They doubt their skills and feel they can’t accomplish what others want them to, and in the end, feel like a failure. They’ll get nervous and shaky, and when the time comes, it’s go big or go home. Take a race, for example. It’s a big race and you need to win the race to win the whole competition. It’s a lot of pressure. Your coaches and your teammates are expecting you to win this race and bring home a win. All those pre-race jitters come full force and when that gun goes off, it’s a matter if the pressure gets to you or you channel that nervousness into some great energy and just do what you came out to do.

All in all, I really wish I could just say “fuck it” and not care about what people think or are going to react to my actions. Because in the end, you get farther away from your dreams if you just sit there wondering what it’s going to be like. Stop pondering and go with the flow. You go out there and find your answer. If it’s not the answer you want, then pick your head up and move on, because shit happens.